Hello my dearest friends! I hope that all is going well. I have thought many times about our reunion and just smile from it. It was such a great time and will forever hold a special place in my heart. I love you all so very much!
Mary has been here in Boise and we were able to get together Friday night and catch up. Oh how my heart and soul needed her! And I know that she needed me. Which further shows that we ALL need each other. I am so grateful for all of you. You have no idea how much your influences mean to me. I especially need you now.
So about the learning curves...I was thinking today about Satan and how he knows so well what our weaknesses are. He knows just what he needs to tell us to bring us down. He knows exactly what thoughts to put into our minds to make us think that we don't need to be strong anymore. Unfortunately, I was caught in a moment of weakness and allowed Satan to bring me down. I placed myself in a compromising situation with a guy and things went a little too far. I have a meeting with the Bishop tomorrow and will see what the game plan will be. In all honesty, I am embarrassed to tell you all this. And I actually wasn't going to. I never thought that I would be one of those girls. Yet, here I am. However, after talking with Mary, she helped me realize that this situation (or whatever problem or situation good or bad is going on in our lives) is exactly what this blog is for. We all are not in the same apartment, let alone time zones anymore, so this is the closest we've got to being there for each other for help and support.
So back to Satan...I realized that part of life is not only learning Satan's tactics, but also learning how to overcome them. I think I am going to make a list of the weaknesses I have and attempt to figure out what I need to do to make them stronger. I know the Bishop will have some suggestions of things that I need to do as well, but I think that this is a start. Do you have any other suggestions?
While Mary was over and we talked over dinner, she shared something that really made a difference in how I feel. I am paraphrasing and probably putting it into the words that I needed to hear, so Mary I hope this is close to what you said! We are all daughters of our Heavenly Father. I know that sometimes we feel like things are too hard for us. Almost as if we think that we didn't sign up for this. Life is hard and it's not fair. But you know what, we knew what we were going to be faced with. Heavenly Father probably sat down with each one of us individually. During that time, we probably talked about this life and what we would be faced with. I'm sure there were many times that our Heavenly Father asked us if we wanted to change our mind about the different trials we'd be faced with. I'm sure he said, "Are you sure you want to go through that? You don't have to. You can change your mind." But as daughters of a Heavenly Father who loves us, we simply said, "No, I think that I can go through that. I'm strong enough with you by my side."
I needed to be reminded that the Lord will be by my side. He is always there with me, as long as I don't push him away. I have obviously pushed him away. I have allowed Satan to make me believe his lies. I have been frustrated and angry with God and wondering why my life has turned out the way it has. But it all goes back to life is hard and it's not fair. BUT as long as we have the Lord by our side, we're strong enough to go through it.
So my dears, to wrap it up...Tonya I would LOVE to have a reunion here in Boise in a few months! I would love to be able to see you all again. I'm not sure if I will be able to go to the temple, but I will be there in spirit. I know that I will get back to that weekly temple going girl that I used to be! I love you all and thank you for loving me and support me!
